Useful Stories From My Teachers-101

People who attend Buddhist retreats (averaging a few days per retreat...often in scenic earthy sorta places on the west coast) have this preconception that the Buddhist teachers, counselors and monks who instruct and act as facilitators are for sure going to be these touchy-feely "kid gloves"  kumbaya types....well, and sometimes they are.....but not always.

Which leads me to one of my all-time favorite stories/lessons as told by my teacher, Jack Kornfield.

Seems this middleaged woman came to a retreat having much difficulty recovering from a recent divorce.  Over the course of the retreat, she -seemed- to get a little better.  At this (and most) retreats, after a day of sitting meditations, walking meditations and listening to the dharma...attendees would meet with counselors...often monks or trained counselors.

Long story short...this same woman a year later attended the same retreat.  Upon checking in, she did her initial intake counseling with a monk....same monk she had seen a couple of times in the retreat she attended a year earlier when she -seemingly- was making progress getting over her ex.

She came to the monks office and to his dismay, she once again was in a deep depression and still stuck in darkness over her ex....whereby the monk......

....stood up, approached her.....

 and slapped her in the face yelling, "It's been a year now...get over him"!!!!!!

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So much for kumbaya :)..... 

I need this lesson.  Many moons ago, I didn't handle romantic break-ups well.......

...AT ALL!.....

  Now...I detest physical violence mindya.  But from a monk I figure it comes from an enlightened place....and Kornfield suggests that indeed the woman "let-go" of her ex during that same retreat.

Good for her! 

Nice job Monk-Dude!!!

"Bring Me Your Wrinkles"

"Bring Me Your Wrinkles"
by Bryan G

Your wrinkles show me your willingness to live. 
They show me the wounds of your life. 
They show me you risked. 
You risked to live, you risked to love, you risked to care along your path. 

To love you only for your unambigous assets is to not love you at all.  Thieves will love you for your assets. 

Narcissists, to the degree they are capable of loving at all, they too will love you for your assets.


Me? 

Bring me your wrinkles.....


We’ll meet discreetly at a romantic getaway.  The lights will be dimmed to non-existence. 

We’ll build a fire together…it’s all the light we’ll need. 

The couch is worn and soft….holding the secrets of lovers who came before.

At first, we’ll do the  lover’s dance of displaying only our finest....  But then….in a moment of mutual clarity,

we’ll lock eyes in a silent and vulnerable gaze.


Simultaneously, we  disrobe the coverings of our hearts….of our pasts. 

You see my wrinkles and hold them compassionately in your heart.  I see your wrinkles and describe the beauty I see within….each and every one.

By night’s end, we have collapsed….exhausted...

…resting  in the beauty of a trust just forged.

Useful Stories From My Teachers-101

One of my life teachers who lives out west hired a carpenter friend of hers to handcraft cabinets for her entire home.  The carpenter lived on some acreage which included his house and a barn he had built which he used as his carpentry studio. 

 One week when the man was out of town, he received a call informing him that his entire barn (studio) had burned to the ground but that his house was spared.  Upon returning to his estate, he reflected out loud to a friend the following.....

"I can finally see the moon from the house again now that the barn is gone.  It's one of the things which made me fall in love with this property to begin with"
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(Bryan)  Too much attachment to material "stuff" or even relationships can blind me to the abstract art and knowledge God places around each and every corner of my life.  I need to "see"  not as a human....but as a spirit would "see".  God seldom speaks to me in english.  How boring it would be.... and small minded of me to expect.... a higher power speaking any language other than the language of enlightened awareness. 

I wish to see the beautiful moons arise from the ashes of my exaggerated...often ego-centered ....attachments to people and things.....